Saturday, October 12, 2019

Computers and Girlfriends :: Essays Papers

Computers and Girlfriends What is it about leading your troops to a bone crushing victory in Blizzard's latest real time strategy computer game, Starcraft, that gives you such a sense of accomplishment? How does playing a video game cause you to let the phone ring and be late for dinner with your significant other... How many fights have ensued when you claimed you were tired and are found lying, playing Starcraft into the wee hours of the night and not waking up till 4pm in the afternoon. Computers and games like Starcraft have taken the place of desperate ho's as the homewreakers of our time. In the past few years, the undeniable bond between males and their non-breathing companions, personal computers has strengthened 10 fold. With the booming popularity of the internet and increasing quality of games and entertainment offerings. Many guys are spending much more time on their computers... time that used to be quality time for the girlfriend. In fact, I bet if computers had nice bodies and breasts, we would n't even bother with girlfriends. The computer is the perfect companion... the computer is never mad at you, it always says what it means and it doesn't matter if they are in the mood or not... porn is available at the click of a mouse. What computers don't provide us with, is the ability to carry offspring, maybe somewhere down the line this will happen... but till then, I guess guys are stuck. :) So, how do we balance between girls and computers? How do we avoid getting in *censored* for getting that one last game of Starcraft in? Teach her how to play! Once she sees how fun it is, she'll be the one calling you on to battle.net for a quick 2v2 hunters game! Give her the inside scoop on how to play (except for your deepest secret strategies, or she might end up beating you one day and she'll dump you to find a better boyfriend that is better at Starcraft) and she'll be kicking newbie ass in no time. Another word of advice, is never let your girlfriend win. Or at least in an obvious manner, they hate this more than anything. Make it close. If you end up trying and getting massacred, simply play it off like you let them win. They will be pissed but it will save you some face and give you some time to improve your skillz.

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